Anger as part of Lament

Message for worship by Elizabeth Terney on the 19th day of the 10th month at West Richmond Friends Meeting

Scripture: Numbers 11:10-17

Anger! What a messy, yet entirely normal, emotion! We all have different relationships with our anger. Some of us avoid it; some of us are ashamed of it; some of us channel it into productive activity. How healthy is your relationship with anger?

My relationship with anger has matured through the years. As a child, I would storm and holler to the skies or my bedroom walls. Once, my mother, a child welfare case worker, found out that the mom of a friend was no longer going to drive me and that friend to an Ohio amusement park; instead, it would be someone my mother didn’t know. She decided that having a stranger drive her daughter across state lines was a bad idea and refused to let me go. I was angry, so I went to my room and yelled and yelled.

As I grew, that changed. I watched my parents’ explosive behavior when they were angry and altered my behavior. My dad used to get frustrated while working on a home improvement project and would storm and curse, and it would get louder and angrier if we ended up in the way. So, my mother and I would isolate ourselves in the farthest corner of the house away from his project. I began to suppress my anger. It would only come out in occasional bursts, but mostly, I avoided feeling angry. I was scared of it. I was scared of behaving inappropriately with it.

It took me a long time to start to make friends with it – to learn how to discharge it in healthy ways and handle situations with maturity. I was taught to use anger outlets like screaming into a pillow, beating my forearms on a mattress, or pushing up against a wall to discharge my anger until I can act rationally. I’m happy to report my parents’ relationship with anger has also improved.

Your relationship with anger has likely been different. Some have never been able to control their anger, while others learned how to manage their anger from a healthy role model.

Scripture shows many stories of angry people. Anger is a normal human emotion. Scripture also tells us that we can get angry at God without being punished.

Our scripture today was the story from Numbers about Moses getting angry at God for the burden he had to bear for the people of Israel. The Israelites have been journeying in the wilderness and were provided with manna. However, many of them craved meat and had other complaints they directed toward Moses. Moses becomes angry and frustrated with God, asking why he must carry this burden alone. Sometimes people are shocked to hear the scripture read in the way Sherrema did today. They’ve never allowed themselves to imagine someone faithful voicing anger toward God. The good news that comes from such a reading of Numbers is that God listens to Moses.

God asks him to gather seventy elders of Israel to share the burden of the people with him. God will put some of the spirit that is on Moses onto them, so he won't have to carry all the weight alone. What a comforting outcome. God listens to our prayers, even when we’re full of anger and rage. God responds to our prayers even if we seem disrespectful.

Being angry with God does not mean losing faith. Many psalms are called lament psalms. They cry out and, in almost every case, stay strongly rooted in faith in God.

Lament is a repeated cry of pain, rage, sorrow, and grief that emerges during times of suffering and loneliness. Some listeners may not realize that anger is a part of lament. We often associate lament with grief and sorrow, and overlook rage. Many people also feel uncomfortable with anger—especially when directed toward God. However, lament is a form of prayer—often an angry prayer—that we offer because God has not met our covenant-inspired expectations. Through this prayer, we present our brokenness to God's heart and demand a response.

Lament is the language of outrage but also of hope. Hope that this is not the way things will always be. Lament allows us to honestly express rage to God for the injustice that constantly befalls us, but at the same time hold onto the compassion of God. Lamenting together and with Christ reminds us that we are not alone.

We today have much to lament. Our prayer care section of our bulletin is full of lament. From the saddening suicide of Joy Sitler to the unfairness of illness. From the hunger in Gaza to the wars and other violence in Ukraine, India & Pakistan, Sudan, and Yemen. To the treatment of the marginalized in our country, especially immigrants. From the pain of parents who’ve lost children to gun violence to those who feel societal norms are daily being disrupted and deleted in our civil society.

Lament is necessary and healthy. Anger is essential and healthy. Lament can keep us faithful in situations where faith and hope are challenged. Lament is expressed in a context of trust and hope that God is active in the world.

Christians experience suffering differently because we base our lives on the gospel story. This story gives us hope, allowing us to take pain, confusion, and disorientation seriously. While we acknowledge these struggles, we also view them through a lens of hope and new possibilities offered by the resurrection. Therefore, we believe in the potential for release and transformation.

As we release and sometimes vent our hurt and anger to God, we are freed to accept that even though this may not be the way we want life to be or indeed the way we want God to be, we are still safe to love God and find hope in being loved by God in the midst of the pains of this world. We can become the type of people who can take seriously the pain and sadness of the world but refuse to be crushed by it.

Lament can be done alone, but it is its most healing when done together.

I ask that we pray a lament Psalm together. It’s Psalm 10 and will be displayed on the screen from the NSRVUE. I’ll read the normal text, and you all will read the text in bold. In this reading, I’m not looking for you all to be in unison. Read this Psalm with emotion. Read it how you want to say it to God. Given the troubles in the world, this Psalm’s anger should be easy to express to God.

¹Why, O Lord, do you stand far off? 

   Why do you hide yourself in times of trouble?

² In arrogance the wicked persecute the poor—    

let them be caught in the schemes they have devised.

³ For the wicked boast of the desires of their heart;   

 those greedy for gain curse and renounce the Lord.

⁴ In the pride of their countenance the wicked say, “God will not seek it out”;   

 all their thoughts are, “There is no God.”

⁵ Their ways prosper at all times;   

your judgments are on high, out of their sight;    

as for their foes, they scoff at them.

⁶ They think in their heart, “We shall not be moved;   

 throughout all generations we shall not meet adversity.”

⁷ Their mouths are filled with cursing and deceit and oppression;  

 under their tongues are mischief and iniquity.

⁸ They sit in ambush in the villages;   

 in hiding places they murder the innocent.

Their eyes stealthily watch for the helpless;

⁹     they lurk in secret like a lion in its den;

they lurk that they may seize the poor;   

 they seize the poor and drag them off in their net.

¹⁰ They stoop, they crouch,   

 and the helpless fall by their might.

¹¹ They think in their heart, “God has forgotten; 

   he has hidden his face; he will never see it.”

¹² Rise up, O Lord; O God, lift up your hand;    

do not forget the oppressed.

¹³ Why do the wicked renounce God   

 and say in their hearts, “You will not call us to account”?

¹⁴ But you do see! Indeed, you note trouble and grief,  

  that you may take it into your hands

;the helpless commit themselves to you;   

you have been the helper of the orphan.

¹⁵ Break the arm of the wicked and evildoers;   

 seek out their wickedness until you find none.

¹⁶ The Lord is king forever and ever; 

   the nations shall perish from his land.

¹⁷ O Lord, you will hear the desire of the meek;  

you will strengthen their heart;

you will incline your ear

¹⁸ to do justice for the orphan and the oppressed,  

  so that those from earth may strike terror no more.

Amen